Bloom Into YOUR Potential

Scrolling through my Twitter feed – I saw a young college student’s tweet last night – that reinforced my purpose, it went something like “College is stressing me out – I don’t know my next move at all.”  It stuck  out for 2 reasons – One – I felt the exact same way at times  when I was in undergrad a few years ago – and two – within one year of graduating (~6-7 mos) I realized – my next move was anything I wanted it to be – there is no magic answer and no one can give it to me. After paying my 1st ridiculous student loan payment it became CLEAR that my next move BETTER BE WHAT I WANT IT TO BE. So I’d better sit here and figure it out.   I promised myself, no way am I going to pay a loan and I don’t love my career  and my check – NEVER.   I further began to really believe – no one can tell me what I should do – should be – can do – or go. NO ONE- that decision was all me.   And that is what I tell my Blooms (you guys). The only people I listened to – who actually became the inspiration behind my message were those who asked me, “How are you going to make it happen?” – “What’s your plan?” – “Who are you networking with” “What does your resume look like and SAY about you….”  (Is it tailored and PERFECT) “What’s your pitch?” (Can you sell yourself) and “…don’t look outward – look within. You know yourself better than anyone – you know if you can write or not – what are your strengths AND weaknesses?” – it is simple. This is what I had to figure out – how to use the raw materials I have collected (degrees, work experience, my talents) to get to where I want to be. A college degree doesn’t guarantee you your dream job – it really doesn’t guarantee anything –  it just potentially grants you access into doors of opportunities for you to choose from – your ambition and hustle – that’s all you.

So here it goes: Your next move  depends on your goal – if you can’t state your goal – you can’t worry about your next move because you don’t have a next goal yet. Goal setting has to come with the firm belief that YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH them.  You have to believe in yourself.  If you have a lot of “Um I don’t knows”….you have some work to do – well some thinking rather.    Life is designed for your navigation – there is no cheat sheet, guide-book or cliff notes – no technical experts if you think about it – just people who have accomplished a level of success who advise based on their experience – so it helps to admire something about their achievements.  I encourage you to follow those who make YOU think and encourage you to stay in the race and stay your course OR from a tough love angle –  tell you to change course.  Certain things are just common sense – and if the advice is not backed up by why it is being offered – take it with a grain of salt. If someone tells you, especially if you are choosing a major, deciding to go back to school  or get a certification,  –  “I think you should do this – there is money in this field” let me be the first to tell you – that does NOT MEAN THAT IS YOUR FIELD. Listen to your gut.   Remember, you are going to be the one that has to go to work and make your living no one is doing that for you – my goal is to help you position yourself on a path that you are going to thrive in – well my goal is to inspire your DREAMS but also have satisfaction and high achievements as well.   If not – that is a sure way to fail or become unmotivated and stir up regret.  And I HATE saying “Man I wish I had…” Boils me up.     I’m no expert – I’m just a naturally curious soul who asks, what I believe to be, great questions about getting ahead, feeding ambition, developing talent and  finding the best advice and resources to get me to my goals while sifting through hot air. So with that – to all my college students, recent grads and fellow 20-somethings trying to figure it out( and parents of them). Bloom!  (Plant your own seeds and nurture your own growth).  

P.S. —

As my mentor has been telling me for 10 years now when I ask him certain questions like “What do you think?” He always responds with – “Every decision has a choice, every choice has a consequence.” – So what does that mean?   Look at the consequence or end result first – I firmly believe – you know before you even start – if something especially career wise is worth your time and energy (and money).   If you only pause instead of jumping ahead first.   Passion and desire determine that.  This is YOUR life – so make your own choices but do NOT be afraid to ask questions and seek advice – pride and ego – need to go in this process. I’d rather have too much wisdom than too much pride.

Keep calm and Bloom! ❤

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When the flow of my life hiccups

Hey Blooms,

Just something that I noticed now that I’ve finally gotten back into a productive rhythm! (Thank Heavens!)

When you’re in your element – your mind is free and creativity is unblocked. You feel in control, balanced and just right.  If you’re not – you’re stressed, frustrated and distracted more than you should be  (almost in a consuming way) resulting  in you getting nothing accomplished and no progress is made. And I hate when the flow of my life hiccups or is disrupted.  But it happens. I just don’t believe you should stay stuck and feel like you can’t do anything.  UNstuck YOURSELF.  Now. Right now. 

Don’t keep going and pushing through – sounds anti-bloom, huh? What I mean is – during these times when I’m just OFF – I go to why I feel that way, I don’t ignore it.  I consider my creativity my livelihood.   If I can’t create – I can’t write.  I’ll go as far as I can’t think – CLEARLY.  And I don’t like not performing or producing at a high quality level.  So, whatever is taking away from it or just draining me. I go and find it – resolve it immediately.   It may subside on its own but it may not – me not being a big risk taker – I don’t have much time in between what if it does and what if it doesn’t.  I kind of just do what I can (if I can) to make sure it DOES.   And get back to:

Blooming!

Quick Quote – Just something I was thinking about.

“The biggest mistake you’ve made is self-pity.” – Red Tails

That line really stuck out to me. I won’t say self-pity is a mistake but self-pity for an extended period of time – yes.  OR self-pity as a crutch – yes.

We all get down – and sometimes it’s easy to slip into just feeling bad for yourself or that “why me” “what am I doing wrong” feeling – I can be guilty of this at times but  – I’ve learned to give myself a moping window. A time frame. I can only walk around feeling sorry for myself but so long. Really.  You can’t dodge these times from happening but you can learn to deal with them efficiently.

Everyone has their suggestions as to how much time you need to cope and get yourself together and yes that is true but the real goal in that time of pity, doubt or depression is to identify WHAT GOT YOU into this mode. I’m here to tell you it doesn’t have to be that LONG.  You control how long you want a situation to consume your life. Really.  REMOVE IT, ISOLATE IT. No No wait, analyze it – make sure you understand why the occurrence happened – what was your involvement then accept it and move on.  I believe everything that happens to you happens to prepare you for your true purpose, calling or role(s) in this world.  And many times we have way more than one role. I am now convinced that God is telling me I need to develop a thicker skin – he’s already showed me what my purpose is – but unless I learn how to let things roll off my back – things will be delayed.  One of my biggest problems used to be letting things bother me.  I mean I used to get hung up on it and dwell. BIG MISTAKE.  I just kept retelling the situation – over and over.  Do you know how much time wasted that is? Like 12,000 hrs or something like that 🙂  I now know and accept that my sensitivity is a gift and curse – and I’ve learned to accept it as such. In order for me to do what I want to do – my sensitivity is a big part of relating to people – so – I learned to prepare myself for situations that may sting – fix it up really quick and move on! No joke.   This is the correlation I hope you guys are able to recognize in your own lives. Everything is connected in your development.  So ask yourself  – Why, especially if they are reoccurring – do these situations KEEP happening? Look inward, outward  – left and right. And be honest.  Do you need to be more confident (don’t we all), validation, lost, confused, repeated bad relationships, career, etc.    Once you figure this out – and become aware – you can really begin to stay the course – and roll with the punches – fight back – get better -get better – get BETTER.   

Whatever you do, don’t give up – remember. THINK.PLAN.BLOOM.  You’re human – life is going to be full of highs and lows – in either case you have to know how to deal and get through the lows especially.  Put together a compilation of songs that instantly get you out of your funk, books, QUOTES – friends, you name it. I’m telling you guys it works.   Call it your “B-Resilient Plan”.  Over the last few years since being out of college I have had my fair share of downs and doubts stemming from career to a failed relationship  but I’ve trained myself to find the lesson or accept that TEMPORARY state and be grateful I’m still here to change my outcome.  Some situations are harder than others, they are.  They just are.  I always go back to my original goal and purpose and nothing brings me out of the slump faster  and more self-gratification or reassurance that “this too shall pass” because “the best is yet to come.”  Stay focused. Stay in your ZONE! (Just not your comfort zone!).

Self-pity = bad

Self-validation = good

Bloom!

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